After the spectacular clusterfucks known as Hurricanes Katrina and Rita, emergency management officials set about to improve evacuation procedures. Of course, being Republicans, their definition of the word "improve" diverges a bit from the commonly accepted meaning of the word, that being "to make better":
Ending speculation about the fate of the Rio Grande Valley's undocumented immigrants during a hurricane evacuation, U.S. Customs and Border Protection has confirmed it will check the citizenship both of people boarding buses to leave the Valley and at inland traffic checkpoints.
Those determined to be in the country illegally will be taken to detention centers away from the hurricane's path and later processed for deportation.
"It's business as usual at the checkpoints," said Dan Doty, spokesman for CBP's Rio Grande Valley sector. "We'll still check everybody."
Needless to say, those with functioning brains are warning that this might not be such a good idea:
Locals responded with predictions of humanitarian disaster.
"We can't wait to see the helicopter photos of us sitting on roofs," said the Rev. Mike Seifert, a priest and activist based in a colonia outside Brownsville. The many area families with one or more undocumented members would just refuse to evacuate, he said.
"Imagine," Seifert said. "We're all in an uproar, everybody's in an enormous hurry, there's just a narrow window of opportunity and you get to the place with the buses and the Border Patrol's checking people. You're not going to go."
To his credit, even Governor Goodhair thinks this is a bad idea:
Krista Piferrer, a spokeswoman for Gov. Rick Perry, said Thursday the state's stand on the issue had not changed.
"The governor's office prefers that the Border Patrol not use checkpoints during times of evacuation for obvious reasons," she said. "It will slow down traffic and create problems. ... During times of emergency our priority No. 1 is safety and we continue to hold on to the same belief."
No worries, say the geniuses at the CBP; it's not like they'll be checking everyone:
Document checks are not mandatory at the checkpoints; it's up to an agent to assess travelers and determine whether to ask for papers. Doty said that even with the checks, 120,000 people could be evacuated within 80 hours.
"Our agents, they do it so often, they know what to look for," he said.
Translation: as long as you don't look too Mexican, you'll get through in no time.
Wherever you might stand on the illegal immigration issue, it should be obvious to you that checking the citizenship status of people trying to evacuate in advance of an approaching hurricane is a colossally stupid idea on its face that suggests a lack of foresight - that is, unless, like me, you’re cynical enough to believe that this is being done with the deliberate intention of ensuring that some people (i.e. undocumented Mexicans) choose to remain behind and thus end up getting themselves killed.
But even so, and despite the rosy predictions of the CBP, this isn’t just going to affect illegal immigrants, it’s going to delay the evacuation of everyone regardless of their citizenship status. Whoever came up with this wonderful idea, whatever their intentions, should be charged with a separate count of criminally negligent homicide for every person who dies needlessly because of this idiocy.
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(via Texas Liberal)
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